The three most over used and abused words in the English language are "I Love You." When you think of finally saying them with some semblance of sincerity-all you need is a little soul-searching and some planning to make sure that what you say hits home.



Mean it
Well, of course, you're blustering. Really, think about it though. Are you sure that you are not just saying, "I love you" because it is expected; or because you think you have a better chance of scoring? Or - and this is really sleazy - because you want something from the other person? As hard as it is to think when in love or lust, do the soul-searching to make sure you really are in love.

What will they say?
You don't want to over-think the situation, but you don't want to be foolish either. If the other person has been giving signals that they are uncertain, what do you really gain by saying "I love you"? This is a situation where you could really feel the sting of rejection, or even worse. Anticipating possible responses will prepare you for the unexpected. Besides, often when people hear the words, they just shut down, or mumble, or make a joke. These things are not rejection. The other person just needs some time to process what they have heard and to respond honestly. Give them the time and the space.

Timing
Don't just drop it into conversation or tell them while either they or you have spinach between the teeth or ketchup on the chin. Don't tell them when one of you is in a hurry, and certainly not while driving on the freeway, stuck in traffic, or any other potentially annoying and/or dangerous situation. Since saying "I love you" for the first time is one of the most romantic things that can happen, timing is everything.

God Lives In Small Details
Plan it a little. The setting has to be romantic. Go to a place that has special memories for both of you - the low-key restaurant or coffee shop you used to hang out at initially, a hiking trail he or she loves or a museum on an off day that has an exhibit you love. Only you know the things that are special to the two of you. If you two do get married, this is a story you will want to tell your grandkids.

Explain Yourself
"I love you" is great, but if there is always a doubtful voice in the back of your head; sometimes you just need an ego boost. When someone says the big three words to you, your little voice will say, "Tell me more! I want to hear the good stuff." When you know you are going to tell the person you love, it forces you to think about it. It will make the relationship stronger, and your commitment stronger and more believable. So tell them, even if you are worried you will sound like a Hallmark card.

It is probably going to be one of the top 10 best moments of your life, it is right up there with your wedding vows. Make sure you know what you are doing and convince the other person of your sincerity and belief in the emotion.